Paradise
by Charlie Baytes
Summary: She was acting mental, and the worst part was, no one seemed to be addressing it. No one seemed to be noticing.   Everyone was too busy worrying about the themselves, to notice that Quinn was slipping through the cracks. Finn/Quinn. One-shot


Finn's POV

"Ugh, I hate the weather outside." Rachel tells you and you both turn to look out of the window of your math class. "I hate it when it drizzles. It's not a full on rain, but it's just enough to make my hair turn frizzy."

She gives a shrug and turns back to her work

But you keep looking.

_Drizzle._

It's funny how much a single word can impact you.

You turn back to your work as well, but instead of listening, you begin to doodle drops of rain drops all over the top of your paper, each drop a tad bit different. Then you start to draw babies.

You suddenly want to remember. Remember it all.

Remember sophomore year, and everything that happened. All the shit you went through.

You want to make it drizzle again.

* * *

><p>Quinn's POV<p>

You walk down the hall, taking slow steps, looking no one in the eye.

You don't have any more confidence. No more sanity.

It all went down the drain, along with your pink hair dye, when Shelby came back from god-knows-where with Beth in tow.

Everyone thinks you forgot all about Beth, but the truth is, you thought about her every time it rained. Every time you felt the cool rain droplets on your skin, you thought of your blonde, perfect baby, and what life might be like if you had kept her. You think of what life might have been like if Rachel had kept her mouth shut about Beth being Puck's baby.

You may still have Finn.

Then again, you may not.

Life's funny like that. You never really know what fate has in store for you until it happens. No matter how much you plan, anything can go wrong, and fate can wreck everything you worked so hard to build.

You would know.

There's a window right above your locker, soft drops of rain lightly hit it.

It's drizzling. It's drizzling outside and you're pretty sure there are a couple of tears falling down your face now.

Everything is crumbling to pieces, you're crumbling to pieces.

* * *

><p>Finn's POV<p>

_It's been drizzling non-stop for two days now._

Okay here's the thing, you know you're supposed to love Rachel, and you do. But you can't help feeling _something_ for Quinn. You try to keep it hidden; try not to look at her too often, or for too long. It's just, you know she's in a bad place right now. You know she isn't in her right mind.

And then you can't help but think about her every time it rains.

Rachel had angrily told you about Quinn wanting to tell Principal Figgins about Shelby and Puck sleeping together, and get Shelby fired because she wanted Beth back.

And yeah, Quinn could be a little insane sometimes, but this was just, out of character.

She was acting mental, and the worst part was, no one seemed to be addressing it. No one seemed to be noticing.

Everyone was too busy worrying about the musical, to notice that Quinn was slipping through the cracks

* * *

><p>Quinn's POV<p>

He finds you. He always seems to find you when you're at your worst. But he finds you sitting in a seat in the front row of the auditorium.

You aren't crying or anything embarrassing. But you still don't want him to find you here, alone, obviously upset about something.

He doesn't say anything, but he takes a seat next to you. He waits for you to say something first. You know what he's here for. You know why he looked for you. Anger bubbles up inside you.

"Look, I don't know what you've heard, but whatever it is, I'm fine, and I don't need your pity." You say hotly between clenched teeth before turning around to face the other direction.

"I don't know what I've heard."He says calmly. You swivel around and glare at him.

"I know that Rachel told you about my plans to get Shelby fired." You point at him. "I know you know. And don't try and stop me. I'm not going to listen to you just like I didn't listen to Rachel." You pull your hand back stand up and wrap your arms around yourself, like you're hugging yourself.

"Beth is mine. Shelby doesn't deserve her. She didn't make her. Shelby doesn't deserve Beth and all her perfection. I made her. Beth belongs with me." You feel tears bobbing up, but you refuse to cry and clamp down on your lip hard.

Finn stands up, "Quinn…" He says, but you back away. He keeps moving towards you and you keep moving backwards until you're basically running from him.

But he catches you.

He always catches you.

He holds you tight and you bang your hands in frustration against his chest. "Let me go! Let me go!" You yell, but you know he isn't going to. But you keep yelling and yelling until you finally break down into sobs, and soon you're just sobbing into his chest uncontrollably.

You go limp and you both slide down to the floor and he just holds you as you cry, uttering comforting nonsense into your ear, rocking you back and forth. You cry into his shoulder until you can't anymore, than you cry a little more.

"Finn, I'm so sad." You raise your head up and croak after awhile.

He nods. "I know, I miss Drizzle too."

"Finn I want her so badly. I want Beth so badly it hurts." You rest your head back on his shoulder.

"I just, when I saw her, I thought that if I could just have her back, everything would be perfect. All my problems would go away. I told myself that what I was doing was right. I told myself that it was all for Beth."

"But it was for you the whole time?" He says finishing your thought.

You nod.

"She's your daughter, Quinn, but Shelby's her mom. She knows and loves Shelby."

"But why can't she learn to love me?" You ask.

"Quinn, you're eighteen. You are young, and beautiful, and smart, and funny, and so capable of everything. Why would you want to keep a child that would hold you back from all of that? More than that, why would you want to put your child through that? Don't you want to give Beth the best possible life?"

You nod.

"Shelby can give her a better life than you can. You would be a young mother. Hardly able to pay your bills, two mouths to feed. How would you go to college? How would you experience new things with a baby in tow?"

"I don't know…" You close your eyes snuggle closer to Finn. "I just, I don't know. I just want to be near her."

More tears run down your face. " I feel like a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't actually know what to do with Beth if I actually got her." You wipe your face. "I guess I always knew in the back of my mind that I wouldn't succeed. It's just Beth felt, when I held her for the second time in my life, like the closest thing I would get to paradise."

Finn softly sung.

'_When she was just a girl,_

_ she expected the world._

_ But if flew away from her reach,_

_ so she ran away in her sleep._

_ Dreamed of _ para-para paradise.__

__ Oh oo whoa oo whoa.' __

You feel a smile creep on your pale lips. "I'm broken, Finn." And you clench his arm. The world is threatening to topple over.

"I know Quinn, I know you're broken. You need help. You need to talk to someone. You can't keep your feelings bottled up inside anymore. It's not healthy. It will make you bitter."

You grin and bump his shoulder.

"I want you to know that I will always be here for you." You nod. "But I want you to promise me that you'll see someone. I want you to promise me that you'll see Ms. Pilsburry."

"I promise." He holds out his pinky.

"Pinky promise?"

You grin. "Pinky promise." You hook pinkies and he helps you up.

* * *

><p>Finn's POV<p>

It's still drizzling later that night. But not as much as before. A light sprinkle now.

You walked Quinn back to her locker, and she in turn, gave you a picture of Beth. You slipped it into your wallet, right next to the picture you had of Quinn when she was Lucy (yeah you still had that picture).

Beth was such a pretty little girl; she was like an exact replica of Quinn, her nose and eyes the same as Quinn's. But she had Puck's smile, and she had Puck's sole dimple on her left cheek. But she was still perfect, and you kind of wish she was yours.

You drive home and instead of calling Rachel, you just lie on your tiny four-post bed and look out your window, as small rain droplets quietly slide down the glass.

You ignore everything. You ignore Rachel's thirteen text, your mom's call for you to come down to dinner. You even ignore Kurt's soft raps on the door. You aren't upset, you just need to think.

Quietly and by yourself.

_It's drizzling._

_It's always drizzling;_


End file.
